I write this as I lay on my bed waiting for my tablets to work. In the morning, my husband was sleeping peacefully when I took tea and his favorite biscuits to his bed. If he doesn’t see tea when he wakes up, he gets angry. So, I make sure every day that my husband doesn’t wake up to a bad mood.
He woke up and was on the phone saying he’s going somewhere. One of my friends called me and told me that his machine was sold. He didn’t tell me that. He never tells me anything, but that’s fine. He spent his life working hard on designing and building a new plant. And the day had finally come when the machine would be finally used. Maybe that’s why he was extra happy and took longer to get ready today. I was happier.
At about 10 o’clock, I waited for him on the dining table. I always wait for him. I love eating together. He came out of his room.He looked so good. He said,“ You eat”, slammed the door and left. I started eating but he came back again. He looked at me and smiled. It was after years that he came close to me and looked at me. I got nervous. He is my husband but I got the love at first sight feeling. I fell in love once again. I lit with joy. I couldn’t believe it was real. I started dreaming when his voice interrupted my dream saying,” Please sign them today.”
I wanted to cry but I didn’t. I don’t cry in front of him anymore. I smiled. Then, he turned back and left. I heard someone come outside. She had come to pick him. They were going somewhere. I overheard them speaking. Jealousy, hurt, heartache, etc cannot explain what I felt and what I have always been feeling every second. He was happy. I was not. There’s nothing I can do. I have accepted this fact.
My friend called me and told me that his machine was sold at 300 crores. A multinational company bought it. All day I thought about him. He must be so happy. I waited for his call every second. He didn’t feel it was necessary to tell me. I wanted to dial his number and call him but I was afraid to do so. Every time I think of dialing his number, I remember the times when he got mad at him for disturbing him and how he used to tell me to mind my own business every time. He doesn’t like talking to me. He used to like me but now he doesn’t and there is nothing that I can do to change the truth.
I tried a lot to get him like me. But now I have no hope. I have stopped seeking his attention after failing infinitely. I loved him so much. I still do, but I lost him to somebody else.
He used to come home every day at 8. But today he didn’t. At 9, I started getting worried and called him. He didn’t pick up. I called him in the interval of every five minutes. I left many messages. He didn’t reply to any of them. At about 11:30, I heard his voice outside. I looked out from the window. She was there, so pretty, hugging him and waving goodbye. She was here to drop him and he told her to call him after she reaches home.
He came inside and burst in anger. He shouted at me for calling him and texting him like crazy. He told me to mind my own business and stop interfering in his life. He told me I was a burden for him and because of me, he couldn’t do things he wanted to. He told me that I sit and eat his free food and he was ashamed of me.
I didn’t say a word. I knew I can’t sleep today. I took four sleeping tablets instead of one and signed the papers. It was our divorce paper. I kept it on the kitchen table so that he sees it when he comes to drink water. He said he wouldn’t talk to me properly or be nice to me if I didn’t sign them. I signed them after months of his satires and cold behavior. I didn’t read any terms of the paper. I didn’t read a single letter. I didn’t hope that after signing this he would be nice to me. I signed it because I am a burden to him and everything will be good to him once I leave.
I have already contacted an old age home nearby. I am a young woman. I will work for that old age home. I told them I don’t need anything as a payment but they have to let me stay there and give me little food every day. I cannot go to my parent’s house to live. I will never tell them what happened. I will go and see them once in a while and if they ask me about my husband, I’ll tell them he is busy.
I was with him when he had 300 rupees in his wallet. Now he has 300 crores on his account. His wife-to-be has a nice car. She’ll take him to places comfortably and soon they’ll buy another one. She will take care of him like I did. They will live happily. I signed the divorce papers and I don’t know why I am not feeling good about it. This is the worst feeling for me.
There was a sound of glass falling in the kitchen. He had gone there to drink water. He must have seen the papers.
Now, I can hear him talking on the phone. He said, “Baby, she’s signed the papers. This is the best feeling for me.” I can’t stop my tears. My body has become so weak. Maybe it is because of the sleeping pills. I recall my doctor telling me, “One day you’ll die of sleeping tablets’ overdose.” I don’t know if I will wake up to see tomorrow’s sun. Even if I do, every day will be so difficult without him.
Such a beautiful narration. Although the incidences in the story seemed so common but the way you have put your words is just great! Keep writing and keep sharing.