Loneliness, emptiness are just big words; you literally feel hollow when someone leaves you. If the reason is valid or if it was some situation, it would be better. But when someone leaves you without any appropriate reason, how are you supposed to handle the stress?
You lived your life in your own ways, did everything that felt right, didn’t let yourself do things that you didn’t feel right. Someone enters into your life. Changes you, fixes you, spoils you in some ways and makes promises. Your whole perception changes! You start looking at things in different ways. And when you look at them, you see your whole future, your whole world, your meaning for life. You love them in every way. Things that seemed impossible, you try and do it for them and you don’t know if it’s the power of love or a miracle, you somehow make it happen. If it was for yourself you’d not have done it. But for them, you do it.
People say that those who we love have places in our heart. You don’t know if they have a place for you in theirs. But you keep a whole space empty, kick others out and let them stay. You assume that they have done it too. Just because you are willing to do anything for them doesn’t mean they’d do it too. But you are stupid. You become insane. You just don’t see anything bad about them. You forgive all the mistakes that they make because you can’t afford to lose them. You get hurt at times, but you heal yourself with the hope of them not repeating mistakes or hurting you again.
The silly things you see in movies, you start doing it yourself. Like smiling when you think of them, looking at their pictures, and sleeping or waking up with their thoughts every single day starts being your daily routine. You do all these things for years just to find out that their promises were not real. Yes, you could have fought with one hand if they held your other. That’s what you’ve always been told about love. You get to hear love is powerful, love is eternal, and love is everything. You tend to believe it. You start trusting them. But they leave.
You think of the one who broke you. You don’t miss them but you think of them. You lose all your respects towards them. You look at them in awe. You think of them in disgust. Sometimes you talk to them nicely just to show them you are strong, but inside you have a crack in your heart because of them and you know that you’d never forgive them.
A person has 206 bones but only a single heart. When that heart starts aching, even your brain stops working. That won’t continue forever. Slowly you start doing your things. Yes, the hurt is still there but your life continues. You start talking to new, better people. You like them, they like you. They approach for a relationship. Some ask you for marriage. But you reject everything. You know you are rejecting happiness. You know you are building a wall from all sides to stay out of feelings. You show your heartless side to the world. Within your smile, you find something missing. You know should open up and take chances. But you don’t want to repeat the same story. You are afraid to hand over your happiness to someone else, scared to give your heart again.
It’s not that someone leaves you and you find yourself dead. No one dies of a broken heart. But it’s true that your life won’t be the same. That’s why loneliness and emptiness are just big words; you literally feel hollow when someone leaves you.